C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
