You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
