I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I faked an abortion last night.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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