lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
