i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
