I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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