I wish I could teleport
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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