im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
