i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
