Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
