doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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