I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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