If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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