i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
