Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
the night ended with taco bell and tears
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
