These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
