Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
