i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
