...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
