I want to make a zoo with you.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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