BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Are we still banned from the library?
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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