are you still at the devil's house?
North Korea, Best Korea!
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
