butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
