Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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