two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
