Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I just want nice things and good sex
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize
