what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
