He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize