quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
