I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Mom said you looked used
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Randomize
