dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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