marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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