Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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