that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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