But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
