I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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