It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
love makes seman taste better
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
