i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Randomize
