I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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