I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
