There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize