She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
