First date: that requires underwear, huh?
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
