i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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