So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Randomize
