What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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