i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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