Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
