i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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