it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
